The first rule of left-wing politics is: find a target victim group.

The second rule of left-wing politics is: if there are no victims available – pretend everyone is a victim.

This might seem tricky in Australia, where citizens are among the most privileged in the history of civilisation, but listening to the ABC drone on to the tune of a billion dollars a year can make anyone depressed enough about their existence to seek out a pseudo-religion.

Climate Change is a cult – I mean – cultural movement that feeds off the modern dystopia of DEI idleness and TikTok fatigue. There are two, maybe three generations of Australians who have no grand nationhood dream to aspire to. They are not going to the moon (well, they are but no one cares), they are not fighting a war of survival, and they are told by their university professors that any form of personal economic achievement will poison their souls with capitalism.

But humans still want to feel important.

They are hard-wired to ‘make a difference’, if not for their children (which they were told not to have), then for their benevolent State Daddy, or in this case, weird Green uncle.

And so it is that potential voters sit down in front of politicians, as if they were preachers, and listen to tales about how they are all victims living on the edge of annihilation.

The sea levels are rising. The cities are going to flood. Or catch fire. Or boil. Or suffer from some sort of unspecified change.

The details are not important. All voters need to know is that it’s scary and entirely their fault for being born. Climate Change is a religion that proposes an original sin where the fundamental component of each human being – carbon – is evil, and that by breathing people are speeding up the hands on the Doomsday Clock.

Millions of people who live their lives inside the safety of concrete skyscrapers – the modern forests – and hunt their food via an app, truly believe that the beautiful ocean encircling Australia will rise up over the High Street and drown them. Imminently.

They believe they will be rendered ‘climate refugees’ on a continent whose sea level has risen 120 metres over the past 20,000 years. We are living in someone else’s post-apocalyptic future, and it’s actually quite nice.

‘We’re all closer to becoming climate refugees than we are billionaires,’ moaned Adam Bandt, the Leader of the Greens.

‘At this tipping point, remember that the fossil fuel billionaires are only spending fortunes trying to stop us because people can win. People have so much power. And the billionaires know it.’

Who wants to tell Adam that fossil fuel is a key component of the renewable energy industry?

Everything from powering the trucks that mine the rare earths, to keeping the lights on in the Chinese factories, to forging the steel for the wind turbines, to powering the container ships that drag them across the ocean, to fuelling the trucks that drive them to remote Australian locations, to operating the chainsaws that cut down the rainforest where they are being installed, to the oil that keeps their systems lubricated during use, and the power required to heat the furnaces that recycle them every 20 years.

Fossil fuel is the blood supply that keeps the renewable energy industry alive.

That’s why mining companies encouraged the government to pursue green energy. It has enabled one of the largest and most profitable mining booms in history.

Thanks to resource-greedy solar, wind, and batteries, we are digging up more of the world than ever and ruining environments that used to be protected.

There are no climate refugees, but there are Climate Change refugees: farmers fleeing their land, whales heading out of our waters, birds dying on the blades of turbines, and rural residents who simply cannot stand the constant drone of machinery outside their window.

When Adam Bandt tweets: ‘In January, billionaires around the world amassed more wealth than the poorest third of humanity owns,’ I am curious if this observation applies to the renewable energy barons and those thousands of companies dabbling in the Net Zero frenzy of public grants…

Why are they allowed to be rich while taxpayers are stripped of their measly earnings?

Helping the poor starts with fixing the energy grid. Nuclear will do that, but what will be left to campaign on if the problem is fixed? Who needs a Greens Party if Australia adopts nuclear energy and saves its rainforests?

There is no reason for Australia to be the dependent child of China’s dirty factories or complicit in the ruin of Asia’s natural landscape because we encouraged Beijing by being the customers of communism.

While we cannot control the sea levels, or the amount of hot air to come out of Adam Bandt’s X account, we can control how much of our rainforests, oceans, and farms we destroy with mindless, short-lived, expensive, and unreliable energy projects.